Oh. My. Gods. (insert heavy breathing)

YES! OH YES! Please, please just let it be properly done.

Things I Wish I’d Done First

Have you ever seen something so incredible you wished you were the one who thought it up?  Due to the unfortunate amount of time I spend haunting the hallways of cyberspace, I run into stuff like this all the time.

The latest?  Man, that sign isn’t kidding.. Those are some AGGRESSIVE pigeons..

LOLCat Friday

It’s time, once again, for everyone’s favorite weekly regurgitation of played out internet memes.  That’s right folks, it’s LOLCat Friday!

Unfortunately this week’s sampling of LOLCats was a little sub par, so I’ve pulled out a few of my own contributions to icanhascheezburger to supplement the only good LOLCat I was able to find.

Hey man, it’s cool…

Mad Skills

My Junk

UPDATE:  Yes, I am fully aware that only one of those pictures contained a cat.  Maybe we could embrace the spirit of the meme rather than the letter?

The Goddamn Batman

I’m not sure if this is real or not, but if it is I suddenly have that familiar tingle running down my spine.

Ashkenaz Festival ’08 Toronto

This evening I will be attending the Ashkenaz Festival at Harbour Front Centre in Toronto. Some of you may be wondering what a Canadian of Irish/Italian descent would be doing at a Yiddish cultural event. For those of you who haven’t heard my rants and raves about SoCalled, I’d highly suggest checking out his MySpace page and listening to his sample tracks (You Are Never Alone in particular is amazing). SoCalled will be performing as a part of Abraham Inc., a self-described 8-piece Klezmer-Funk Supergroup.

UPDATE:  Due to inclement weather and a whole lot of social bullshit I was not able to make this show last night.  Which SUCKS.  I’ll try to find a sample or something online.

Thursday FYI

Busy at work = Blog suffers

It’s been an absolute clusterfuck of a day so far.  I’ll try to get something entertaining up a little later on, but morning updates are temporarily reshceduled.

African Lion > 42 Cambodian Midgets

There is not a thing I can say that would make this article any funnier than it already is.

I will however add the following:

Can you give me a hand? Ive got a little something stuck in my teeth.

International Space Station – HAXXORED

As of this morning NASA has provided confirmation of a viral outbreak within the computer systems of the International Space Station (ISS).  The virus in question (which is actually a worm, and not a virus) is known as Gammima.AG and has been farting around the Internet stealing people’s MMORPG account info since last year.  Three laptops brought on-board by newly arrived astronauts are thought to be the source of the infection, however NASA is unsure how this worm infected the laptops in the first place.  The current theory is a USB key used by one of the astronauts contained the worm, which infected the laptops and from there the station itself.

Pardon me for asking the obvious question, but maybe installing virus scanning and security software in a GODDAMNED SPACE STATION might be a good idea? NASA officials have assured the media that no command critical systems will be impacted by the malicious software, which is really good news.  How bad would it be for the astronauts to wake up tomorrow morning and realize someone was in their account, shardin’ their purples?

Perhaps it’s time to reevaluate our opinion of Astronauts and Rocket Scientists…

Red 5 Standing By

Things like THIS are the reason I love the internet.

UPDATE:  A few more home-brewed additions:

Revenge is a dish best served cold. And at 3:30pm.

The elderly are probably our single greatest comedic natural resource.  Check the image after the break.